Fear of Being Judged By Other People
My client, Amy, has a near phobia of taking her 10-year-old son with Autism and other disabilities out in public because of her fear of being judged by other people. 

She imagines all eyes being fixed on them as he stims and repeats words.
She imagines other people are judging her child and her parenting.
She imagines how she will respond to the unlucky person who makes a snide comment.

All of Amy’s imagining created real fear for her, and this fear led her to confine herself and her son to their home.

When Amy brought this topic to our coaching session, I  got straight to the point:

Other people aren’t the problem, you are.

That is, the only reason Amy was afraid of other people judging her son is because she was judging him.

She believed he was “a lot”.
She believed his stimming was distracting.
She believed his word repetition was annoying.

And all of these beliefs were keeping her and her son locked away from the community.

Here is a glimpse of our coaching session:

Me:    Do you believe your son has a right to be in the community?
Amy:  Absolutely! He is a wonderful child.  He loves going to new places.  It makes him so happy.
Me:    Then how do you want to show up as the mother of a child who stims and repeats words?

Amy decided that instead of focusing on her son’s behaviors, she wanted to focus on his right to be there and his joy.

And that is exactly what she did the next day when she took her son to a local coffee shop. 

She noticed her default thought “he is a lot” come up, and redirected herself to “he belongs here.”  
She noticed other people looking over at them, and she reminded herself, “we belong here.”
She watched as her son ate/wore his cake pop and smiled at how happy he was. 

Just like that, for the first time in over 2 years, Amy was able to enjoy time with her son at their new favorite coffee shop and let go of her fear of being judged by other people.

Have a great week, and enjoy your child!

Lisa

P.S. To get “The 7 Truths Every Autism Mom Needs to Know,” click here.
P.P.S. If you are hiding out or playing small because you fear other people will judge you and/or you child with Autism, I can can help you with that.  ​Book a complimentary consultation call here so we can talk about helping you feel better and whether it makes sense to work together.